Memory Loss

Okay, so my memory has been fading pretty quickly.  It happened right when I became a mother.  The amount of information I need to retain and be proactive about just squeezed out the rest of the information I had before thought so vital.  Sadly, my family is suffering the consequences of a forgetful mama.
This morning was a prime example.  Pablo is our chihuahua and we have to be really careful about letting him go outside.  We have hawks and coyotes right at the back of our fence and can't leave him out there too long alone.  The hubby is really adamant about this.  Me...not so much.  This is because, I seriously forget I let him out or need to let him back in.  This repeats itself every morning.  This morning Josh let him out and said let him back in a few minutes.   I look him in the eye and say, "Yes. Sure, no problem."  Then, I go on living the rest of my life.  I had a toddler to wake up, dress and feed.  I had 7 emails composing in my mind about some stressful work drama that had been unfolding all week.  I had my To Do list circulating because it's Friday and Friday is "ME" day and I have to have a To Do list or I.Will.Die.  I had a strong desire of wanting to create some jewelry today because I haven't been able to in too long.  My mind was at capacity.  Plus, I still had one more sock to put on.

Down at breakfast, Josh is frantically looking for Pablo.  "Did you let him in? I can't find him!  He's not in the yard, either!"  I freeze, trying to remember...who's Pablo?  Okay, it's not quite that bad yet.  I remember opening the door and calling him.  I remember him not coming right away.  Josh darts out to the yard fearing the worst.  That a hawk has picked up poor little Pablo.  He comes back in, more frantic this time.  Me...still calm.  Still trying to remember if I let him in or not.  Then, I realize, Yes!  I did let him in.  Right before I put on that other sock.  Or was it after?  Either way, he came in...right?  I know I let him in yesterday.  Does that count?  My husband gives me the most "I'm so annoyed with you right now" glare.
Well, we search and find Pablo comfortably curled up on the pet pillow just calmly looking at us.

We get in a discussion about how I simply can't remember letting him back in.  I try to explain my side:  We have too many pets!  I can't keep track of them, work, home life, our son.  How did we get this many pets?! I think some of them should pay rent.

I'm trying and I'm failing.  I do love little Pablo to pieces, but I was just sure it would work itself out.  Pablo could be in, Pablo could be out.  Pablo could be drinking a beer.  It'll be fine.
Poor Pablo.  I'm sorry little buddy.  I'm trying here.  I just can't remember ANYTHING like this.  I can remember work stuff, for the most part.  Home life is another battle.  It's the little things that I don't have a capacity for anymore.  The last 3 times I've taken Pablo with me to visit my mom, a sibling has ran out in the driveway flagging me down as I pull away and then hands me my little puppy.  Oops.  3 TIMES IN A ROW this has happened.

Maybe I need more yoga.  Maybe I need more mediation.  Or meditation at all.  Does counting running upstairs only to stand in the hallway and wonder what I came upstairs for count as meditation?  I'm still.  I'm quiet.  I'm breathing.

Mamahood brought me so much happiness, but then took most of sanity and memory with it.

Will it come back??  Or...gasp!  Am I turning into my mother?!

When Pablo was a puppy.  So, so cute!

Over Thinking

I saw this on Pinterest the other day and it has been creeping into my thoughts.
Although, I do not like to associate this with myself, I can be an over thinker.  I would like to eliminate this aspect of my personality, but honestly...how do you turn off your brain?!
I just really like how this is put.  Direct and simple.  I really want to invite this philosophy into my life.  Just wanted to share it here because I'm finding this simple statement so true for myself.

My Must Have Command Center

I've got lots of organizing around here to do (don't I always?!).  House de-cluttering, yard projects, college fund to set up, blah, blah, blah.  In being the multi-tasker that I am (home manager, mama, part time marketing director and 2 small Etsy businesses) my desk is my command center.   I have a small desk I work from in my living room that is quickly becoming as  cluttered as my to do list and I'm losing the battle of keeping it organized.  My printers are upstairs in a back bedroom, along with half of my filing system.  If I want to print, my laptop and I venture upstairs.  It's super annoying not to have everything in one place.  In my hunt for a solution, I found these:  Computer Armoires!

This is one that used to be for sale at Pottery Barn and is no longer available.  :(

From Pinterest

                                                                                               From Pinterest

I love how you can just close the doors and your desk area is out of sight.  This is going to save my life.  I'm an office supplies freak and love making spreadsheets (gotta love Google docs!) for whatever I possibly can.  Having a tidy desk area makes me feel like I can get my world in order and get some stuff accomplished.  Now, off to find one that fits my budget.  These seem to be quite popular right now as the one I'm really wanting is on back order (story of my life).

Great Website For A Cause

One of the great things about Facebook is finding out about other websites so quickly.  I saw this in my News feed this morning and wanted to take a moment to post it here to help raise awareness.

The Girl Store:  Buy a Girl Her Life Back

If you have ever traveled abroad and had the opportunity to see a completely different culture, country and way of life,  it is not only interesting and eye opening, but often shocking.  For some people things such as child marriages or sex slavery can be a reality. A harsh conclusion for them.  We don't get to pick where we are born.  The mere fact that I was born in a country with choices and with freedom that so many others do not have is something I strive not to forget.  So many others are not that fortunate.  From day one, an option of a choice to live the life they would choose for themselves is not in the cards for them.

What I love about this website is how simple it is to become involved. Something so little as a $5 donation to fund a lunch set so a girl can go to school adds up and makes a difference.

If you have a moment, please check out this website and share where you can.

Have a great day!

casey

Hmm...What To Do, What To Do?

Friday night we get date nights.  Our amazing (translation:  I don't have to worry about a thing concerning my child when we leave the house) sitter comes and our little love waves good bye and blows kisses, practically shoving us out at the door and we are on our own for the night.
Most date nights are dinner and a movie, which generally suites us just fine as we love watching films.  However, from time to time we have those nights where nothing is showing that we want to see and we find ourselves lost and empty of ideas of what to do with ourselves.
We are in our 30's and have come to terms that sometimes we have outgrown this little college town of ours.  Going to bars isn't in the agenda for us.  Sometimes we will stop in for a drink somewhere.  Linger on our words, maybe share a dessert.  Overall though, unless you are on the hunt for some nightlife bar fun, this town has limited choices for the 30 + something life we are leading.
Spring and summer are easier to come up with ideas.  There are parks and trails to explore.  Old fashioned, warm weather, night walks.  A favorite of mine!  However, these months of winter I'm finding myself clueless on what to do on date nights.
We rarely venture out to Kansas City, which is only about a 30 -40 minute drive away.  Not sure why. There are so many more restaurant options there (Ethiopian!), museums and friends.  This is definitely something that needs to go on the table of ideas.
I haven't gone to a good dinner party in way too long or scheduled dinner out with another couple.  Those too are going on the table as well.
I just wish there were more things locally that interested us to enjoy when we have a night out.
We often talk of how long will our roots be grounded in Lawrence?  I certainly didn't have intentions to stay this long.  Love and life though often change our ideas and plans into reality.
There are so many things I do love about this town and how we live our lives in it.  I suppose I'm just asking for some spark.  Some change in our routine.   This past Friday, we went to dinner and decided to skip a movie since there wasn't anything we really wanted to see.  We drove around for awhile and then got some ice cream.  And then...then the night ended with us hitting Walmart.  Yep.  We like to party.  Pretty lame, huh?
If you get a chance to go out, what is that you like to do?  I'm up for suggestions!

Patience Is A Virtue

My New Years celebration was nothing over the top. Simple, cozy...right for me. The days of crowded dancing, smokey eyes and foggy memories are behind me. One love fast asleep in his jammies and the other beside me as always. Content and full, happy I am.

Before midnight, we were headed outside, spiked cocoa in hand to start a fire, but the cold rain surprised us and detoured that celebration. It didn't matter though, because as long as we were laughing together, the night was just right.

I stopped making a lot of resolutions last year. One or two seems more attainable for me. This year I choose patience. Patience with all that confronts me, cuts me off, or tosses me to the wind. Patience with those I love. Patience with those I appreciate for just being present. Patience for disagreeing and seeing how I would do it differently. Patience with frustration, nagging and clutter. In my mind, in my home, in my soul. Patience with anxiousness and change. Patience with those furry creatures that live in our lives and share our days. Patience with running late and for being out of sync when I get there. Patience with me. For all my craziness, indecisiveness, moodiness and ridiculous behavior that sometimes creeps up on me. Patience is a 365 day challenge that is tattooed in my mind each morning for 2012. I welcome the challenge. 

(oh yes, and I special request from the universe an extra helping of patience for the number one entity that requires patience in my daily life...Leon, our cat. As I type he is pushing me and pulling my hair from the back of the couch. He is never petted enough, can sit close enough to my face or be fed enough. Always disappointed he is. Poor fella.)

Happy New Year. Happy New Morning. Happy New Opportunity.